Look at that.
Look! 240 channels of anything
we want to watch. No accounts.
No fucking passwords. Just pure, simple,
basic cable. [ Door opens ] Ma! Dad!
Guess what! Not now, Scott. Your mom and I are enjoying
watching whatever we want and not signing up
for anything. But, Dad, there’s
this new girl at school, and she has diabetes! Oh!
That’s wonderful, Scott! Yeah,
and guess what? She wants to come
over to our house! So, we have to
get Disney+! Aw!
Not this shit again! The answer is no! Dad, please!
This is my life! Streaming services
are destroying our culture, Scott! People got a thousand shows
at their fingertips 24/7, so now Hollywood has
to make shows within their shows to make more shows! But, Dad,
what’s wrong with people watching what they wanna watch
when they wanna watch it? [ As Scott Malkinson ]
What’s wrong with people watching what they want
when they wanna watch it? I’m Scott Malkinson.
I have diabetes. Unbelievable! [ Scoffs ]
Yeah, it’s me. It’s time we took all these
streaming services down. Tell all the guys
we’re meeting A.S.A.P., in a window between 10:00 a.m.
and 2:00 p.m. on Thursday.