Personal Growth Series 1: Take Responsibility

this video is going to explore taking responsibility as a tool for personal development this is the first video in a personal growth series which is going to explore all the main topics in personal development and give you the tools you need to grow and succeed as an individual the reason why the first video in this series is about taking responsibility is because nothing can move until you do that you can't undertake any kind of personal growth until you take at least some degree of responsibility and the reason for this is it goes something like this you can actually argue that you're not responsible for your life so you can say that it's the government is the economy it's your genes it's the stars it's your parents it's whatever right those are all true arguments you can make in regards to you know your success or lack of success in life equally you can argue that it's down to decisions you've made it's down to your the feelings you've got it's done to your philosophical point of view and so on and so on that's where you that's got you to where you are now the first bunch of things they're all true but they'll lead you to hell like if you do that you'll you'll never take action because you're waiting for them to for the government or your genes or whatever to change and so you'll never take action and so you won't grow whereas if you believe that as your feelings and your thoughts and you know decisions you've made that that are actually getting you to where you are then you'll look at them and you'll change them and as such you all grow as an individual so growth can only happen once you take responsibility which is why I'm staying this video series of that there's a quote from spider-man but I think it's originally from Winston Churchill where says with great power comes great responsibility and that's true but what people don't realize is is actually an equation and with it works the other way too so with great responsibility comes great power so my goal with this video my hope for you guys and girls is to is to empower you I want you to be strong you become strong by taking responsibility so I'm gonna give you some of the aspects of how you might take responsibility for your life so the first one is that you're actually responsible for your emotions so I often hear people saying things like he made me sad or she made me feel really insecure or something and don't do that you made yourself feel sad you made yourself feel insecure because once you say I made myself feel sad then the next question then becomes well what can I do to change it what can I do to make myself for a left sad and then when you ask that question honestly you start to get these really cool answers about what you can do and you start to practice them and fail and practice again and then you grow a competency an internal competency of how to stabilize your emotions and be tranquil even in the face of unfair treatment but it all comes from taking responsibility in the beginning blaming others I see this all the time people blaming others or other institutions or groups of people for their situations I just think it's silly and immature you're responsible for your life and once you take responsibility you can actually do something about it one of the awful things I hear from time to time is people saying he made me do it or she made me do it that's all for you are in control of your life you are in control of your thoughts you are in control of what you do don't ever give responsibility away for that to other people it's it's it's a truly dark thing to do so an interesting thing that happens when you start to take responsibility is all these people come out of the woodwork that are ready to tell you not to be too hard on yourself that you don't need to take responsibility that you just need to relax I think this is an awful freakin message and I want to just break down what's going on here so when people say don't be so hard on yourself mostly what's happening is by taking responsibility you're empowering yourself and you're shining a light on the way that this individual doesn't take responsibility in their own life the way that they smoke where they drink master bei the way that they don't they buckle and they don't tell the truth and that person knows D down the lack of responsibility is crippling them and you shining a light on it is actually threatening to them so what they'll do is a way to defend against having to look at this really challenging aspect of their psyche and this opportunity what is effect an opportunity for personal growth they're going to deflect that out and try to convince you not to take responsibility so that you're not forcing them to examine their own critical failure to do so we also have quite a problem with narcissism in our culture in 2019 and that many people are narcissistic to one degree or another so when you take responsibility you're actually empowering yourself because take responsibility is power narcissists don't want you to be empowered so their be threatened by that and if people are narcissistically oriented they're gonna try and find ways for you to not take responsibility so that you get back into your little box and that you are you're not in danger of making them feel insecure about you overtaking them so watch for that so I do want to say that there is actually a limit to where your responsibilities must begin and end you're not responsible for the whole universe but but there is a degree inside yourself that you're responsible for and understanding where that boundary is properly placed is is one of the most important philosophical questions that we adults need to understand as we move through our life so I just give you a couple of data points that I think might help you you absolutely are responsible for your emotions so whenever you feel a certain way you want to ask yourself why you're doing it and how what you can do to gain more control and skill in this domain you're not responsible for the emotions of other people so I I would offer I would argue that you want to kind of offer help and be kind and and try to offer insight and a bit of help here and there but if someone else is upset or frustrated fundamentally you're not responsible for that's their that's their responsibility and their right and their power to work on that I do think however that you're responsible for maintaining your boundaries on how you wish to be treated so people are talking to you disrespectfully or they're invalidating you or this kind of thing then you're responsible for speaking out for saying that you're not happy with that I'm for establishing what you think are fair boundaries of how you wish to be treated and you are absolutely responsible for your emotions so if you're ever feeling anything like that take responsibility for it I think we can all agree that entitlement is a rather ugly and feeble demeanor and attitude to take when we see entitlement and other people it's quite clear to most of us that is rather ugly so apart from taking responsibility as a tool to empower yourself also you want to avoid yourself from entitlement which which is kind of the opposite of taking responsibility is is a sense of entitlement and just I'd like you to distance yourself from from that rather ugly way of conducting yourself one of the really cool things I actually think about taking responsibility in 2019 is that it's it's a counterculture idea so if you watch the mainstream media or some of the big tech companies or other mainstream narrative propagators you'll notice that they're trying to make you entitled they're trying to disempower you and they're trying to give you this narrative of poor little you and there's nothing you can do and I actually think it's really exciting because not only with with the message of taking responsibility you're really empowering yourself but you're also playing this very rebellious role by saying that I'm responsible I'm responsible you won't hear that message in schools you won't hear it or you'll hear it less and less from the big tech companies and you certainly won't hear it very often in the mainstream media so not only do you get to become strong by taking responsibility but you also get to be a rebel which is kind of fun so in once you know how to take responsibility you are at you're going to be ready to take on the other principles of personal development which I'm going to put out in this in this video series so if you have any ideas or suggestions about things that you'd like me to cover put it in the comment section and if it's something I know about that I think could be useful I'll them I'll make videos on it equally if there's something I've already covered that you think you want me to expand upon then then put that in the comment section too and I could always make a series on on any of these principles that are particularly important so the take-home message here ladies and gentlemen is you're responsible take responsibility and empower yourself good luck

  1. Such valuable insights here, I literally started taking notes. Looking forward to where this series goes in future!
    This is a really inspiring channel, it motivates me whenever check back in here. I think your own journey in particular of self improvement is really inspiring because we’re witnessing your progress in each video. Thank you for the great vids !

  2. Your videos are really helpful, thanks a lot. I like how you go direct to the main topic and don't take too much time to say things. Zen budism says that habits are the base to achieve virtue. With small acts, day by day we start to grow and become better or worse, so we must pay atention to our habits. Thanks man and I hope you keep making videos.

  3. Hey, Richard Harris. I have been watching your videos recently and I love the passion and knowledge you put into each video. I am a 16 year old man trying to improve myself. Its the summer and I find myself lazy and unmotivated. This taking responsibility video has helped right now. But what do you think I should do In the long run.

  4. Is simple as it sounds and you speak the truth .
    Any liar will be cough in a blink of an eye.
    What I really appreciate is the main image you focus in your message.
    I know you are reading , while studying the human body and body language most wouldn't notice it but I did,you did it real well.
    Your message is really powerful and the science behind it is like a temple.
    Try zen , It'll empower you as a stone buda but only you can transcend ,only you can find that zen master in the mountain

  5. I would listen gratefully to a piece of advice on how to deal in an environment where you feel like on a hostile soil. Say if a Marcian would take a human form and decide to live among humans, what are the commonalities he must focus on to succeed in building trust and mutual appreciation?

  6. Hey man, I just wanted to say I really appreciate your videos. Maybe it's because you're a fellow Brit, or perhaps more so I feel that you really genuinely care about the development of the people you're talking to. It really resonates with me.

    I'm 27 now, had a pretty crazy life. Did a lot of travelling, got into heavily into drinking and drugs, also had trouble with pornography and masturbation. I'm back in the UK now with the intention to heal, change habits and start to move onto more positive productive inwardly flourishing stage of my life.

    I was wondering, could you recommend any books for me? I'm looking forward to your next videos.

    Much appreciated,

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